In life one has to face a huge assortment
Of nauseating fads and good advice
Theres health and fitness
Diet and deportment

And other pointless forms of sacrifice
Conversation? Wit? I am a doubter
Manners? Charm?
Theyre no way to impress
So forget the inner me observe the outer
I am what I wear and how I dress

Oh now I believe in looking
Like my time on earth is cooking
Whether polka dotted
Striped or even checked
With the some glamour guaranteeing
Every fiber on of my being
Is displayed to quite remarkable effect

From your cradle via trousseau
To your deathbed youre on view so
Never compromise accept no substitute
I would rather wear a barrel
Than conservative apparel
For my dress has always been
My strongest suit
Overwear
Underwear
Anytime
Anywhere

Staying in or hitting town wards
From the top and working downwards
I ensure that every stitch
Is stitched in time

Whether wig or hat or turban
Whether clad boudoir or urban Is stitched in time
Not to strut your stuff
Outrageouslys a crime

And the few who are invited Such a crime
To my wardrobe are delighted overwear
As they wander through my things underwear
To find en route anytime
Were wandering through your th

That in negligee or formal Ooh negligee
I am anything but normal
Ooh anything but normal normal

For my dress has always been
My strongest suit Overwear underwear
Anytime anywhere
Overwear underwear
I am what I wear Anytime anywhere
Overwear underwear
Anytime anywhere
I said anytime Overwearunderwear
Anytime
Anywhere

Finest
So bring me all my finest Divinest
Most audacious my divinest
Most revealing
Most expensive and to boot
Most revealing most
expensive
Most arresting Most arresting
Most heartstopping
Most heartstopping Most heart-stoping
Most free-flowing Overwear
Most eye-popping Underwear
Most arresting Anytime
Most heart-stopping
Anywhere
Dress has always been Dress has always been
My strongest suit
I am what I wear
My strongest suit
I am what I wear
You know that
I am what I wear I am what I wear

Dress has always been
Dress has always been My strongest
My strongest My strongest
My strongest My strongest suit My strongest
My strongest My strongest
My strongest suit My strongest suit

My strongest suit!